Patagucci on Hell

bgbeerbraOne of the best parts of our annual sojourn to the 24 Hours of Horseshoe Hell – aside from seeing all the Oklahomies, climbing bullet sandstone, and partying with the goats – is getting to hang with the Patagonia crew. Kristo always rounds up a solid group: last year it was Sonnie Trotter, Jonathan Thesenga, and Brittany Griffith; this year it was Brittany, Kate Rutherford, Colin Haley, and Mikey Schaeffer. You’d be hard pressed to find a radder, more laid-back group of athletes (well except maybe the TNF gang, tough call).

Anywho, the ‘Gonia folks were good enough to piece together an entry about the week for Patagonia’s blog The Cleanest Line, and they even gave a little shout out. Check it:

Twenty Four – and so much more…

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Back from Hell

Airing it out on Filthy Sanchez (5.11ish), a beautiful Arete at the Ranch. Photo courtesy Lucas Marshall.

Airing it out on Filthy Sanchez (5.11ish), a beautiful Arete at the Ranch. Photo courtesy Lucas Marshall.

That title is far too negative sounding, but I’m not the one who decided to name the event “24 Hours of Horseshoe Hell” rather than “A Full Day of Horseshoe Heaven.” Big Andy made that call, so I’ll just adopt his preferred nomenclature.

It would be equal parts impossible and boring to recount the entire week, so I’ll save everyone the trouble of skipping over a long post. Needless to say, we had ourselves a good ole time in them thar hills. The Ozark Mountains. Arkansas. God’s country.

The week at the Ranch leading up to the comp held plenty of climbing, partying, mullets, and $3 breakfast specials. As always Kristo and his crew of Patagonia athletes were a blast to hang out with, although it was too bad the Canuck couldn’t make it this year.

The comp itself was incredible. Les and I – “The Shawtay Slayas” – held our own and came in at 6th place. We had decided to try and climb for quality rather than quantity, so the vast majority of our 57 pitches apiece were 5.10 to 5.12. We even sent a 5.12 (albeit a very easy one) on hour 23!

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The Numbers

Here’s a random collection of numbers I threw together in retrospect of the last week at Horseshoe Canyon Ranch for the 24 Hours of Horseshoe Hell climbing competition.

% of the ole Oklahoma Crew that made it out: 90

Miller Lites consumed by Adam and Andrew on Tuesday: 30

Pitches climbed by our team (White People Can’t Dance): 123

Pitches climbed by Sonnie (not his team, just him): 119

Shoes I blew out: 2

Estimated calories consumed during comp: 7000

Core shots on my rope: 2

Entry fee: $40

Plane ticket: $300

Rough total value of free schwag: $500

Times I brushed my teeth in Arkansas: 2

SUM TOTAL = One of the most ridiculously fantastic weeks of all time.